Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Facing my fears

I hate doing things alone. I don't know if it's an actual phobia, but it sure does feel like one to me! Having a meal alone, going to the movies alone, using public transport alone, these things just freak me the hell out! (As old as I am!) Don't get me wrong, I love and value 'alone time'. It's just the 'doing things by myself' part that I'm not comfortable with. As I have recently moved away from home, I've been having to do a lot of things by myself, including another fear of mine, going to the gym!

 
I'm a very paranoid person. Combine paranoia with a fear of doing things alone, and that could result in some disaster! (caused only by myself!) I feel like the people at the gym are judging me, and will pick on any fault I display, I'm too shy to use the equipment because I don't really know the ins and outs of the gym, I'm afraid I'll look like an idiot, and I'm afraid that I suck at gyming!
So I needed to go to gym this week, and was going to be working out alone, and I think I spent most of the day obsessing over what I would do at the gym! I Googled work-outs, things to- and not to do at a gym, how to overcome shyness at a gym! It was quite crazy! When I got to gym, I was pretty nervous, but after putting on headphones and almost zoning out, I felt a lot better! (I did, however, have to cease my workout as I was having a problem breathing---NB. If you have bronchitis, or any illness, don't be an idiot like me, wait until you've fully recovered before you resume exercising and gyming!). So I regard that as a baby step, and every baby step counts in the end :) I have arranged for a gym tour next week, with on of the gym consultants so that I can be more aware of the different types of machines I can use, and workouts I can do, in order to meet the different goals I aim to achieve (e.g. lose weight or tone up). 
I'm pretty sure there are other people out there like me, so if you're also afraid of going to gym alone, know that you aren't alone, and just like any other fear, you can overcome this. Address the issues that cause the fear. For e.g. one of the reasons I was scared of gym, was that I may use the equipment incorrectly and not only end up breaking something, but also making a fool of myself! So by having a tour with someone who knows the machines and is familiar with gym, I can become more familiar with the machines and I'll be less worried that I'll mess up :) It also helps talking to someone, a friend or family member. I nagged my cousin Nicole the entire day, and she did an excellent job of keeping me calm! And of course, the answer to many of our problems, MUSIC! Get those headphones on and wait for the rest of the world to disappear! :) 

So don't let your fears dictate your life. Let's own them! ;)

Artwork by Milly- "Farewll Senorita"

About three months ago, I had to say farewell to a good friend of mine. As a parting gift, I painted (or rather attempted to paint a portrai...